...such an awful, tearing sound...

It's where you wake up every morning feeling even more exhausted than the night before. Where you feel like the path you've chosen is the wrong one. Where you feel like everyone else has it all figured out and you're up to your neck in confusion. Where you try your hardest to be who you want to be but only end up dissapointing yourself. Where your spiritual life, though progressing, feels like more work than everyone else makes it seem. Where you're fed up with the world because you realize that every one is human and is capable of letting you down. Where it feels like you are made of two layers, and every emotion you ever feel is only beginning to scratch the first. Where you search for someone to tell you what you want to hear knowing that no one can. Where everything seems so unbelievably plastic and you just want it all to melt. Where the places that you once ran away to are now so familiar that its sickening. Where the people that make you happiest are tearing you down day after day. Where the only amusment you find is in the stupid jokes you make in your head that no one would ever understand. Where it feels like your heart is spilled out on a white, cold table in front of 15 foreign doctors, all failing in their search for your problem. Where you want to just give up and die right there but you know that you have to get away from it...

Thats where I'm at right now.